Friday, March 18, 2011

(This is one of those navel-gazing posts that are probably boring to read, feel free to wander on to something more interesting.)

Just prior to the pregnancy that ended with a miscarriage, I diagnosed myself with a hormone imbalance. Yes, diagnosed myself (with the help of the internet, no less, clearly I must be insane). I was researching what might have caused a particular problem and stumbled on a list of symptoms associated with hormone imbalance and was astounded to find much of the list matched changes that had taken place in my body over the last year or two - things I had not thought might have a common, fixable origin, but had simply (and naively) chalked up to approaching age 30.

Of course, while I'm reasonably confident that I've correctly diagnosed the imbalance, the underlying cause of the imbalance could be from several different things. I could seek professional testing and diagnosis, but frankly, I've never found the medical community to be as trustworthy and knowledgeable as they portray themselves to be.* Besides being hard to diagnose with accuracy, conditions that cause hormone imbalance are usually treated with prescription drugs (something I'm not willing to utilize) or rest, improved diet and exercise.

So rest, improved diet and exercise it is. It seems my top vices (gluttony and sloth) must now be faced head-on if I'm to see an improvement in my health. Those might seem like odd vices for a thin person to confess to, but my hard-working metabolism has simply made indulging said vices that much easier over the years.

Fortunately my husband is willing to work with me on this, since he's overweight and stressed and feeling the need to improve his health as well. So we've already drastically reduced his beloved pasta, and my beloved sugary indulgences, while adding more vegetables and fruits. Fortunately, this seems to be having a positive effect for both of us in the form of more energy. I have not been experiencing as much of the severe fatigue that would often happen in the afternoons, when I would find myself fighting to remain awake.

I've got a couple of supplements ordered and on the way that will hopefully aid in restoring hormone balance; I've also dug out the jump rope I bought years ago. My husband got to snicker over my undignified efforts yesterday, but I think it should serve nicely as a source of cardio - besides being free, quick, and able to be done in my own backyard behind a privacy fence. I can tell I'm severely out of shape, though. 50 skips (not even proper jumps) and I was wheezing. Fortunately it seems improvement can happen swiftly - by my sixth set of 50 today, my muscles were sore but I was not breathing as heavily afterward.

Hopefully I'll be able to battle sloth successfully and stick to these efforts to improve my health. I certainly have a pressing incentive to succeed - there's a good chance the miscarriage was tied to my poor health. I do not want to go through that again.

*I realize that sounds odd, considering my willingness to draw from accumulated medical information to diagnose myself - but it's easier to diagnose symptoms than to find a nearby medical practitioner that can be trusted to provide working treatments. I'll go to a doctor to get a wound stitched or a bone set, but when it comes to the intricacies of the human body, I prefer to give my body what it needs to try and resolve the problem itself, first.

Sunday, March 13, 2011

hk2's take

This is an excellent post on a subject of Game. I know many are getting weary of reading about this topic, but it is worth your time to take a gander at this one. Without even getting into the subject of Christianity and the Bible's take on relationships, he pinpoints some of Game's worst flaws and explains a notion I had never been able to put into words: that a man should be a man with or without women.

Monsters

The Palistinian people are monsters. They raise their children to be monsters just like them by saturating them with evil, hate-filled beliefs.

They hand out candy and celebrate when a Jewish family is brutally murdered in their beds, including the family's three children.

These people do not deserve anything from the international community except scorn.

Saturday, March 12, 2011

A Small Arrow

I confirmed my pregnancy Friday morning, even as I worried that something was going wrong. This morning, just one day later, my pregnancy ended, but that was not the end of the story. A friend of mine, not knowing what had happened, called a few hours later and told me about a dream she had two weeks earlier. In her dream, my husband and I had had another little girl that we named "Dart." My friend thought that was a really weird name, but my husband and I said we liked it. Apparently the name Dart means 'small arrow.'

So, my husband and I have another arrow in our quiver, and though we will not be able to hold her in our hands as we wanted, she is now in the very best hands that could ever hold her.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Wives

IN LIKE manner, you married women, be submissive to your own husbands [subordinate yourselves as being secondary to and dependent on them, and adapt yourselves to them], so that even if any do not obey the Word [of God], they may be won over not by discussion but by the [godly] lives of their wives,

When they observe the pure and modest way in which you conduct yourselves, together with your reverence [for your husband; you are to feel for him all that reverence includes: to respect, defer to, revere him--to honor, esteem, appreciate, prize, and, in the human sense, to adore him, that is, to admire, praise, be devoted to, deeply love, and enjoy your husband].

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I wish that this passage were usually read from the Amplified version. It shows that what is desired of Christian women is so much more - and so much less - than mere submission. A woman can submit to her spouse and show none of the qualities listed above in the process - and she can refuse to participate in something she knows to be wrong while still displaying the qualities listed above.

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The question is not whether or not women should behave in the manner described, but whether or not the husband has the right and responsibility to make her behave in the manner described by whatever means necessary.

Game for the married Christian male

I sympathize with the men that desire to fix their marriage. A marriage that is broken or malfunctioning is a very painful thing - I know, I've been there.

Boiled down to its essence, marriage Game is about getting a man what he wants from his wife; usually more sex, more respect, and less grabbing for the reins. Now, a man might say that marriage Game is about giving both the husband and wife what they want - he becomes a better husband, and in return she becomes a better wife.

Here again, we run into problems. He is only becoming a better man by sinful standards, and she is only becoming a better wife by sinful standards.

Vox has more than one thing wrong when it comes to Game. You see, men and women do have spiritual equality. We may not have the same spiritual responsibilities, but that is another matter. A Christian man and a Christian woman are both immortal souls, once lost from grace, but reconciled to God through the shed blood of Jesus our Messiah.

A man's wife's body and time may belong to him through the marriage covenant (as his body belongs to her now) but her soul belongs to her Creator. Did her husband shed his blood so his wife could be reconciled with God? Did he purchase her place in heaven at the cost of his own life?

Does a man own his wife?

No. God owns his wife. A husband is just a steward, just as a father and mother are stewards. We are human beings and no immortal soul "belongs" to us, to do with as we see fit for our own benefit.

A man may have headship in his family here on earth, but it is a temporal headship - a delegated responsibility, not a right. When he and his wife pass into eternity, that headship goes away, just as the marriage itself goes away, because what we will find in eternity is the real truth of which the marriage union is just a shadow.

What matters more here on Earth? Fleeting physical pleasure and happiness, or immortal souls?

A man's headship in a marriage does not give him the right to retard the spiritual development of his wife's immortal soul.

How does it retard her spiritual development? By transferring the responsibility for her actions from her shoulders to her husband's shoulders. Oh, there are plenty of women happy and content to be freed of responsibility this way. That does not make it right. A woman needs to learn self-control. She needs to learn patience. She needs to learn kindness. She needs to learn faithfulness. The fruits of the Holy Spirit need to become manifest in her life.

She is not going to learn these things when the impetus to do so has been removed. The husband that Games his wife is not helping sharpen her as iron sharpens iron - instead he is putting a brace on her back and a crutch in her hand. If the brace and crutch are ever removed, he and she will find that she does not have the strength to walk on her own. What kind of love is that? To keep someone spiritually weak so our own desires are fulfilled?

Adam certainly would have done well to tell Eve she should not eat the fruit, but it was not his responsibility to physically restrain her from doing so. Adam's responsibility was obedience to God - to refrain from joining Eve in her disobedience.

Game is not obedience to God. Game is joining Eve in her disobedience.

Wednesday, March 09, 2011

Game for the single Christian male

The premise behind this one, as I understand it, is to allow a man to attract lots of female attention and to give him his pick of the women that show interest in him. Not for promiscuous sex, of course, but for finding (and holding) a mate.

The problem with this is that Game is not built to attract good marriage material for a Christian - it is unlikely to attract a woman in whom the flesh is being put to death for the sake of her savior - instead it attracts self-centered status-seekers in the throes of bondage to their sin nature. The second problem is that a man practicing Game to attract women is not just trying to attract women - he's trying to attract pretty women with "market value" in his eyes and the eyes of his peers. He's not looking for a Plain Jane that still has some acne from time to time and is a little overweight, even if the Plain Jane in question would be a faithful, forgiving, loving wife that would not be looking to trade him in for a better model. Please note, even Vox has admitted that not all women are the hypergamous woman that Game is tailored to. He's also stated that the men he terms 'deltas' could probably have good marriages to women that are not high status. Yet, all of this gets swept aside - the implication is not that it is worth being single and waiting for a woman of substance, even if a man waits a lifetime, but that such a creature is too hard to find, and he may as well get what happiness he can with the hypergamous crowd - besides, why settle for a 4-5 (no matter how good a woman she is) if he can use Game to get a 7-8 instead?

No doubt here is where supporters would tell me I have it all wrong: Game is actually about becoming a better man (in order to attract better women).

A better man by whose standards? The standards of sinful men and women.

I guarantee you that when God said David was a man after His own heart, He was not referring to David's ability to get the ladies to spread their legs. That aspect of David's personality is actually what got him into the most trouble with God, after leading him to adultery and murder, actions that earned him the death of his infant son.

There is nothing wrong with stripping away the bad habits and bad attitudes inculcated through Feminism. No woman should be put on a pedestal - no bit of creation, ever, should be put on a pedestal. The only One worthy of worship is our Creator. And no one should choose their actions based on fear of rejection or loss - we have not been given a spirit of fear - what can man (or woman) do to us? But when a man strips away the bad and the useless, he needs to make sure he's not replacing it with more of the bad and the useless. What is the use of stripping away your flesh only to replace it with your flesh?

Monday, March 07, 2011

Where did this notion come from, that the Bible does not teach men how to interact with women? That a system like Game is needed because the Bible is lacking in this oh-so-important area of life?

I’m here to call horse-shit on that notion.

The Bible is quite clear on how we’re to treat everyone.

Love God.

Love your neighbor.

Love one another.

Love your enemies.

Nowhere in there is an exception granted on the basis that the other in question is a woman.

We even have it spelled out quite clearly just what love is.

So why are so many Christian men flocking to Game on the basis that the Bible has nothing of worth to say on the matter?